You have been taught that motivation should come from within you. Relying on external factors is discouraged because it is fickle, unreliable, and will lead to disappointment. True change comes from within.

I disagree. 

When considering whether or not to take action, internal and external factors exert unequal force.

Take intention, for example. If you intend to do something, you’ve put thought into it and decided to proceed. Maybe you’ve written down this intention. If you haven’t discussed it with anyone else, declared your intention in the presence of others, or openly committed to a course of action, then your intention is internal. If you don’t follow through, you might be disappointed in yourself, but you’re used to that.

Risk and reward are similarly divided between public and private domains. If you do not take action despite your private intention, you punish yourself through guilt, shame, remorse and self loathing. If, on the other hand, you’ve made your intention known publicly, inaction or failure might invite criticism, disapproval, penalty, or damage your reputation. Personal shame is endured more willingly than public disapproval, even if the “public” is one other person.

Internal rewards of pleasure, satisfaction, pride and confidence are nice, but external praise, validation, money and approval are more potent reinforcements.

When you want to do something, it makes sense to share your intention. The internal motivation, risk and reward are multiplied by accountability. It’s a lot easier to let yourself down than others with whom you have shared your intentions, made commitments and set expectations. 

Outsourcing motivation works because it creates urgency, which is required for action.

-Thor Bergersen M.D.